The tip’s get clocked, baby. The bond’s get stocked. My style gets rocked. Just like doors get knocked. With legendary status, like my name’s Lou Brock. -Everlast
Public Service Announcement: OK here we go! Here it comes. Here comes baseball. Like my main man Joe DiMaggio always says: “You look forward to it like a birthday party when you’re a kid. You think something wonderful is going to happen.” I’m looking forward to it. I think something wonderful is going to happen. I live for this!
What’s crack-a-lacking sports fans? I loved Lou Brock. Put you in shock. Stealing bases around the clock. A virtuoso like my main man Johan Sebastian Bach. I loved Willie Wilson. Looking good in those baby blues. Faster than Deja Vu. Quicker than any cheetah in any zoo. I loved Rickey Henderson. Probably the best lead-off hitter I’ve ever seen. The best base stealer there’s ever been. I loved Tommy Harper, Rock Raines, Firecracker Vince Coleman. I loved them all, they’re the stolen base kings of the game we call baseball. Joe Morgan once said: “A good base stealer should make the whole infield jumpy.” So that’s what we want to know. Who in 2010 makes the whole infield jumpy?
On May 10, last season, Reyes reached 300 steals in the seventh inning in a game against the Pirates. Two weeks later, he was placed on the DL due to a calf injury and was nary seen again. He’ll be seen again this year all right. And how! The first player in baseball history to have more than 63 steals, 120 runs, 192 hits and 19 homers in a single season. The first player since Marquis Grissom to exceed sixty steals in consecutive seasons. He led the National League in stolen bases in 2005, 2006 and 2007. In his short time with the New York Mets, he already is the their all-time leader in both triples and stolen bases. Jose Reyes: the hand shaking, base taking, record breaking, stolen base king.
Meet the new king. Same as the old king. Michael Bourn led all of baseball last year in stolen bases. This season, expect more of the same. This kid got game. Say his name! The only reason Michael Bourn made it to the bigs is his base-stealing prowess. Sure he won a Gold Glove last year, but old King Midas never would have touched Bourn’s A2000 if it weren’t for his thieving abilities. At the University of Houston, he displayed little power, but won attention from professional scouts by stealing 90 bases in 119 attempts. 90 bases in 110 attempts! Yowza! He hasn’t slowed down since. He ain’t gonna any time soon either.
There’s only one thing you gotta know about Carl Crawford, he’s an ath-uh-lete. Recruited by UCLA to play point guard. Recruited by Nebraska to play quarterback. Carl Crawford chose baseball and aren’t we all glad he did? He’s a sight to behold. Last year, against my beloved Red Sox, he was a record tying sight to behold. As he slid into second at the Trop, he slid into a tie for the modern major league record with six stolen bases in one game. How about that? How about this? Last May, Crawford became the first player with at least forty hits and twenty or more stolen bases in a single calendar month since, yup, you guessed it, Rickey Henderson. When you get your name up there with Rickey, you’re doing some things. Some historic stolen base things.
When the Dodgers traded Juan Pierre to the Chicago White Sox, the Sox got the leadoff man they needed and Juan Pierre got the chance to be an everyday player again. Hooray Juan Pierre! Now Juan gets the chance to be the stolen base leader again. Pierre is a former two-time National League champ. Get the papers, get the papers. He also has the most stolen bases of any active player. In 2008, when Pierre stole his 100th base with the Dodgers, he became only one of four players in MLB history to steal at least a hundred bases with three different teams. With the White Sox, you can make that four different teams. With six you get eggroll. With Juan Pierre you get one base stealing summamabitch.
I saved the bestest for lastest. Attention please, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, welcome to Fenway Park. Now leading off, Ellsbury, center left field, Ellsbury. There hasn’t been this much excitement on the basepaths around here since 1973. Since Tommy Harper. Tommy Harper may never have been allowed to join the Elks, but in 1973, he led the American League and set the Red Sox single season stolen base record with fifty-four. Last season Jacoby Ellsbury broke that record. Broke that record en route to leading the American League in stolen bases for the second consecutive year. That’s not all he done did. He stole home. You saw it. You saw it on Sports Center. You’ll see a lot more this season.
Peace out homies. Six Two and Even!