Greer is putting the ball in play. … He gets it out. … and Havlicek steals it!  Over to Sam Jones.  Havlicek stole the ball!  It’s all over!  It’s alllll over!  Johnny Havlicek is being mobbed by the fans.  It’s alllll over!  -Johnny Most

Public Service Announcement:  Oh well.  I guess that’s that.  I can’t say I’m not disappointed.  I had such high hopes.  But this is a team that was decimated by injuries.  A week ago today, in the biggest game of the year, my beloved Red Sox started Daniel Nava in left. They started Darnell McDonald in center They also started a second baseman who was a 22-year-old kid making his second big league start (Yamaico Navarro).  Yikes! You can’t expect to get to the post season like that. Oh ya, not to mention, let’s not forget, that because of said injuries, Boston’s everyday first baseman has been Mikey Lowell.  Don’t get me wrong. I love Mikey Lowell.  He’s a hero in my book.  He’s also hitting .235 and plans to retire at the end of the year.  Senator, I served with Kevin Youkilis.  I knew Kevin Youkilis.  Kevin Youkilis is a friend of mine.  Senator, you’re no Kevin Youkilis. Read More »

Yo it’s my turn, I demand my respect.  Give me my burn, or get slammed in your neck.  ‘Cause it’s my turn, I’ma reach to the top.  Gimme my burn, I’ma speak with the glock.  -Big Pun

Public Service Announcement:  Ok, here we go!  What’s quack-a-lacking sports fans?  Word has it, Steelers quarterback, Byron Leftwich’s strained his left knee ligament in Thursday night’s preseason game.  Word has it, the injury could sideline him for most or all of the first month of the season.  You know what that means boys and girls?  That means the Steelers are left with only two healthy quarterbacks.  That means the Steelers are left with just Dennis Dixon and Charlie Batch for their September 12 opener against the mighty mighty Atlanta Falcons.  However, word also has it that it will be Dennis Dixon who gets the nod in the opener.  Apparently, after the Steelers learned the nature of Leftwich’s injury, Dixon was immediately taken out of Thursday’s game against Carolina.  Apparently, that’s a strong indication that Dixon was being protected.  Hooray Dennis Dixon.  I’ve always loved this cat.  Top Cat!  The indisputable leader of the gang.  He’s the boss, he’s a pip, he’s the championship.  He’s the most tip top, Top Cat.           Read More »

I’ve got more action than my man John Woo and I’ve got mad hits like I was Rod Carew.  -Beastie Boys

Public Service Announcement:  There was a time when the pitcher was often the best hitter on his team.  A time when guys like John Montgomery Ward, Wes Ferrell, Walter Johnson and George Herman Ruth roamed the earth.  Those time are not these times.  In these times,  players are far more skilled than their ancestors.  In these times, pitching and hitting are both so difficult, that specialization is a must.  In these times, it’s almost impossible for any one person to perform both tasks competently.  That is of course, unless you’re name happens to be Carlos Zambrano.  The Big Z.  El Toro.  The best home run hittenest pitcher in baseball today.       Read More »

Last offseason the Philadelphia Eagles, because they’re just better people than the rest of us, saw through all of the negativity and cynicism and signed Michael Vick. Nay, this was not a decision based upon some selfish desire to make their football team better, as most of us would do, but a selfless sacrifice at the alter of humanity, a lone hand reaching out to pull a troubled soul back from the edge of the Abyss.                      Read More »

You’ve done it now.  You’ve gone and made a big mistake and I can’t allow, you to think you can just walk away.  So turn around and face the piper, you’re gonna pay.  -The Undertaker

Public Service Announcement:  What has Jay Mariotti gotten himself into now?  The man we all love to hate has got some ‘splainin’ to do, Lucy.  According to the LA Times, ESPN personality and sports columnist Jay Mariotti was arrested overnight by Los Angeles police officers.  Word on the street says it is a case of domestic disturbance charge involving his girlfriend.  Word on the street says some type of physical altercation allegedly occurred.  Word on the street says Mariotti pushed and shoved the woman. Word on the street says Mariotti grabbed the girl’s arm and left marks.  Yup, like Jay-Z always says, “The, streets is talkin, niggaz is gossipin.  Bitches all in your shit, what’s the cause of it?”  Apparently, the cause is that Jay believed his girlfriend had been flirting with another man.  Can you blame her?  I know some guys who don’t blame her.  In fact, I know some guys who are probably taking relish to this.  Roger Ebert is taking relish to this.  Chad Ochocinco is taking relish to this.  Ozzie Guillen is taking relish to this.  Hawk Harrelson is taking relish to this.  The chickens have come home to roost.  Get your popcorn ready!

Peace out homies. Six two and Even!

Soy un perdedor.  I’m a loser baby, so why don’t you kill me?  -Beck

Public Service Announcement:   The Pittsburgh Pirates were once a proud franchise.  They were once a storied franchise.  A gloried franchise.  An illustratoried franchise.  They are five-time World Series Champions.  They played in the first modern World Series.  They had guys like Bill Mazeroski, Roberto Clemente, Honus Wagner and Willie Stargell.  Guys like that there.  Oh, how the mighty have fallen.  Are you like Gomer Pyle?  Are you surprised, surprised, surprised?  Of course you’re not.  How could you be?  How could you be surprised that a team that has traded away practically all of its major league talent could be playing this badly?  How badly?  I’m glad you asked.                Read More »

Need someone to explain to me how this whole “second chance” thing works. After sucker punching trash talking  Boise State player Byron Hout last year, LeGarrette Blount was suspended for the season, but recieved the fabled second chance from Chip Kelly, who either had a big heart or more likely a big hole at running back.  Blount returned and helped the Ducks waddle into the Rose Bowl, where they were subsequently sucker punched themselves by Ohio State.             Read More »

Deny, you’re such a liar. You won’t know the truth if it bit you in the eye.  Deny, you’re such a liar.  You’re selling your no-no all the time.  -The Clash

Public Service Announcement:  Ok, here we go!  See what happens?  Roger Clemens was steadfast.  Roger Clemens was adament. He denied being injected with Winstrol by Brian McNamee approximately four times in the buttocks over a several-week period with needles that the Rocket provided.  He denied McNamee injected him in the buttocks four to six times with testosterone from a bottle labeled either Sustanon 250 or Deca-Durabolin that McNamee had obtained from Kirk Radomski.  He denied being injected by McNamee four to six times with human growth hormone received from Radomski.  Read More »

Come see victory in a land called fantasy.  Loving life to a new degree.  Bring your mind to everlasting liberty,  -Earth Wind & Fire

Public Service Announcement:  Here it comes!  Here comes football season.  The thrills.  The spills.  Oh, the humanity!  Like my main man Knute Rockne always says, “Football is a game played with arms, legs and shoulders, but mostly from the neck up.”  Fantasy football is played from the neck up.  To win, you have to be smart.  Not like Fredo.  Like dumb.  You have to be smart to get respect.  That’s where I come in.  Everybody knows about Drew Brees.  Everybody knows about Adrian Peterson.  Everybody knows about Andre Johnson.  It’s the other guys you have to know about.  The sleepers I’m here to crow about.  So let’s get to this.  Like we always knew this.  The Fantasy Football All-Sleeper Team:       Read More »

Oops!  I did it again.  I played with your heart.  Got lost in the game.  Oh, baby, baby.  Oops!  -Britney Spears

Public Service Announcement:  Watching last night’s Red Sox – Rangers game brought back memories.  Terrible memories.  Horrible memories.  Painful memories.  It has been said that, “The heart that truly loves, never forgets.”  I truly love my Red Sox.  I don’t forget.  I can’t forget what happened on that fateful date of October 17, 2003.       Read More »