It’s a family affair, it’s a family affair. It’s a family affair, it’s a family affair. -Sly & The Family Stone
Public Service Announcement: Ok, here we go! I’m sick. Real sick. Puking bile sick. Not too sick to spread rumors though. Fun rumors. Juicy rumors. Like my main man Flavor Flav always says, “We got Magnum Brown, Juicy Valooski. Super-calafraga-hestik-alagooski.” Ahhh love. Exciting and new. Come aboard, we’ve been expecting you. We weren’t expecting this. According to The Philly Four, Jeff Carter had an affair with Scott Hartnell’s wife and the entire Flyers locker room is split over the situation. Yowza! Yowza! Yowza!
This is good stuff. HR Puffenstuff. Can’t get a little and you can’t get enough. Like you couldn’t get enough of Jimmy Jackson and Jason Kidd. Like you couldn’t get enough of Gary Leeman and Al Iafrate. Like you couldn’t get enough of Ryan Grant and Larry Johnson. Like you couldn’t get enough of that stuff there. Riley Cote has gotten enough.
On Cote’s Facebook page, he states: “i feel the need to address a terrible rumor about 2 of my teamates hartnell and carter. 100% not true. do not believe what you hear. nothing but pollution. i got both there backs. now let’s put a beating on the pens!!” Just so you know, it was Riley who spelled “their” wrong, not me.
The Philadelphia Flyers are in a tailspin. They have lost 11 of their last 14 games. And now we, the rumor-mongering internet, are mongering this rumor. Can you blame us? Did you blame us for Lindros and Brind’amour years ago? Oh, you did? You traded Brind’amour for it? Who gets traded this time?
Peace out homies. Six two and Even!