And you may tell yourself, this is not my beautiful house! And you may tell yourself, this is not my beautiful wife! Same as it ever was…same as it ever was…same as it ever was. -Talking Heads
Just a quick one today. Quick as a licorice stick one today. Quick as a mouse click one today. Today, the good folks over at Ed The Sports Fan posted a lamentation entitled When Your Favorite Player Gets Traded. He said stuff like, “There’s nothing worse that can happen to a fan than when that fan’s favorite player…gets traded.” In light of this, and in light of the recent moves that sent Melo to the Knicks and Deron Williams to the Nets, I got to thinking. I got to thinking that so many times in sports, guys have ended up in uniforms they just don’t belong in. Uniforms they just look wrong in. Here are a few that I never got used to:
The greatest Bruin ever. The greatest hockey player ever. Number four, Bobby Orr. Better than all the rest. Greater than the Great One. In 1971, Bobby Orr piled up an unbelievable 139 points. 139 points! 37 goals and 102 assists. No player had ever scored 100 assists in one season before, and only two have since. The Great One and Super Mario. Orr did it from the blue line. He did it faster than anybody I’ve ever seen. Number four, Bobby Orr. The greatest hockey player who ever lived. You don’t believe me? Just ask Don Cherry. Or his dog Blue.
This guy could fight too. They tested him his rookie year. They didn’t test him again. But the 1975-76 season brought changes. Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes. Turn and face the strain. Ch-ch-changes. Just gonna have to be a different man. Trades dismantled the Big, Bad Bruins.
Orr managed to play just 10 games due to injury-riddled knees. Contract negotiations hit an impasse between Bobby and the Bruins and marked the end of an era. Bobby became a free agent and ultimately signed with the Chicago Black Hawks. Just never seemed right.
The biggest of the Big Three. The Chief. The Chief played fourteen years with the Celtics from 1980 to 1994. The Chief won three NBA Titles with the Boston Celtics. His rainbow jumper was a thing of beauty. Somewhere over the rainbow. Skies are blue. And the dreams that you dare to dream, really do come true. Robert Parrish made dreams come true. Robert Parrish ended up a Charlotte Hornet. Just never seemed right.
What can be said about the Hammer that hasn’t already been said already? In Atlanta, 53,775 people showed up to watch Aaron hit career home run 715. The ball landed in the Braves bullpen. Thirty days later, Aaron ended up on the Milwaukee Brewers. I’m gonna give you thirty days to get back home. I done talked to the gypsy woman on the telephone. She gonna send out a world wide hoodoo. That’ll be the very thing that’ll suit ya. I’m gonna see that you be back home in thirty days. Back home in Milwaukee. Just never seemed right.
Thank Heavens for Dwight Evans. Cannon for an arm. Lasar for an arm. Dr. Evil should get sharks with Dwight Evans’ arms attached to their heads. Dwight Evans was the best defensive right fielder of his time. Dwight Evans won eight Gold Glove Awards. You hear that Ted Sarandis, eight! I know my heart can stay with my glove, its understood. It’s in the hands of my glove, and my glove does it good. Wo-wo-wo-wo-wo-wo, my glove does it good. Evans ended up on the Orioles. Just never seemed right.
Joe Cool. Three Super Bowl MVPs. In his four Super Bowl appearances, Montana never threw an interception nor lost a fumble. He was the first player in league history to win consecutive MVP awards. Sports Illustrated magazine’s Sportsman of the Year award. I`m the man of the year. Stand in line to meet the man. I’m the man, I’m the man, I’m the man. The Man for the San Francisco 49ers. Ended up a Kansas City Chief. Never seemed right.
Here’s some more: Joe Namath, Rams. OJ Simpson, 49ers. Pete Rose, Phillies. Steve Garvey, Padres. Willie McCovey, A’s. Eddie Murray, Indians. Wade Boggs, Yankees. Tony Dorsett, Broncos. Earl Campell, Saints. Dave Casper, Vikings. Never seemed right.
Make my living off the evening news. Just give me something-something I can use. People love it when you lose. They love dirty laundry. -Don Henley
Peace out homies. Six Two and Even!
Need More? Atlanta Braves,Baltimore Orioles,Barry Bonds,Bobby Orr,Boston Bruins,Boston Celtics,Boston Red Sox,Charlotte Bobcats,Chicago Blackhawks,Dwight Evans,Hank Aaron,Joe Montana,Kansas City Chiefs,Milwaukee Brewers,MLB,NBA,NFL,NHL,Robert Parrish,San Francisco 49ers,San Francisco Giants