As evidenced on the new Sports Illustrated cover.  Not that there’s anything wrong with that:

More Yankees gayness:             Read More »

Welcome back.  Your dreams were your ticket out.  Welcome back to that same old place that you laughed about.  Welcome back, welcome back, welcome back.  -John Sebastian

Public Service Announcement:  Ok, here we go!  Back in 2006, Francisco Liriano was the man.  Like Ron Burgandy, he was a man who discovered the wheel and built the Eiffel Tower out of metal and brawn. That’s what kind of man he was.   Back in 2006, Francisco Liriano got off to a 12-3 start.  Back in 2006, Francisco Liriano captured two Rookie of the Month nods and a spot on the American League All-Star roster.  He led all of baseball with a 2.19 ERA.  He was in the discussion for both the Cy Young and Rookie of the Year awards, but a trip to the disabled list on August 11 left him with too few innings to qualify as the league’s official ERA leader and jeopardized his chances at any such awards.  Eventually, Francisco underwent Tommy John surgery and missed the entire 2007 season.  He just has never been the same.  Until now that is.        Read More »

Who’s afraid of the big bad wolf , the big bad wolf, the big bad wolf?  Who’s afraid of the big bad wolf?  Tra la la la la.  -Three Little Pigs

Public Service Announcement:  Ok, here we go!  The Celtics are back baby!  Back in the back of a Cadillac.  Number one with a bullet, they’re a power pack.  They’re a power pack in these here playoffs all right.  Know this sports fans, when the Boston Celtics are power packin’ with their starting lineup intact this season, they are 38-18.  Like my main Larry David always says, that’s pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty good.        Read More »

Though the mountains divide and the oceans are wide, it’s a small small world.  It’s a small world after all.  -Walt Disney

Public Service Announcement:  Ok, here we go!  Earl Weaver must be rolling around in his grave.  Gone are the days of the three-run homerun and a  cloud of dust.  This is a new era of Red Sox baseball.  It’s the new style.  Four and three and two and one, when I’m on the mic, the suckers run.  Don’t look now Red Sox fans, but the Olde Towne Team is playing small ball.      Read More »

Let’s get that money man, yeah!  Let’s get that money man.  Let’s get that money man, yeah!  Let’s get that money man.  -50 Cent

Public Service Announcement:  Ok, here we go!  Back in December, the Phillies signed Roy Halladay to a three-year, $60 million contract extension with a one-year vesting optionfor $20 million.  Up to now, he has been worth every penny.  Some folks even say Doc has a legitimate shot at becoming the first 30-game winner since Denny McLain in 1968.  I don’t know about all that.  What I do know is that last night Halladay improved to 4-0 with a 0.82 earned run average and 28 strikeouts.  Sweet sassy molassy!  I also know since earned runs were first compiled officially (1912 in the N.L., 1913 in the A.L.), only two other pitchers went 4-0 with an earned run average under one and at least 28 strikeouts in their first four starts with a team.  I know that those guys are: Fernando Valenzuela for the Dodgers in 1981 (4-0, 0.25 ERA, 36 strikeouts) and Cliff Lee for the Phillies in 2009 (4-0, 0.82, 34).  When all is said and done, Halladay will go down as a first ballot Hall of Famer.  When all is said and done, he will go down as the best pitcher of his generation.  

Peace out homies.  Six two and Even!

So you wanna be a rap/rock superstar, and live large.  A big house, 5 cars, you’re in charge.  -Cypress Hill

Public Service Announcement:  Ok, here we go!  I know, I know.  I know I’m a day late and a dollar short.  I know yesterday was all Big Ben all the time.  I wasn’t around yesterday.  I was doing things.  Big things.  Important things.  Things you wouldn’t understand.  Not today.  Today I’m weighing in.  First things first.  First thing is, I agree with everything Roger Goodell and the Pittsburgh Steelers have said and done.  Like Crash Davis, I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone.  I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter.  I also believe Big Ben acted like a real creep.  But why are we so surprised?  Why all the outrage?  It’s our own damn falts.       Read More »

It was a very good year.  It was a very good year for city girls who lived up the stair with all that perfumed hair.  It was a very good year.  -Frank Sinatra

Public Service Announcement:  You’ve heard of Year of the Dragon.  It isn’t the Bronx or Brooklyn.  It isn’t even New York.  It’s Chinatown…and it’s about to explode.  You’ve heard of the Year of Living Dangerously.  Love caught in the fire of revolution.  Heck, you’ve even heard of the 40-Year-Old Virgin.  The longer you wait, the harder it gets.  This is better than all of them.  This is the 1983:  The Year of the Quarterback.  This the best damn draft ever!           Read More »

Most illingest b-boy, I got that feeling.  “Cause I am most ill and I’m rhymin’ and stealin’.  -Beastie Boys

Public Service Announcement:  Ok, here we go!  The Tampa Bay Devil Rays.  The toasts of the town.  See me walking around, I’m the boy about town that you heard of.  Just so many good stories to choose from.  So many good stories you can’t lose from.    Stories like phenom Evan Longoria.  Tower of power.  I’ll devour.  Hitting the ball a country mile.  Stories like a pitching staff with four starters who all throw in the nineties.  Who all throw with consistency.  Stories like Sports Illustrated picking them over my beloved Red Sox in The American League Beast.  And then there’s Carl Crawford.  That old compromisin’, enterprisin’, anything but tranquilizing, right on Carl!       Read More »

Today’s top links from the wide wonderful world of sports and beyond:

• He Forgot The One When Scottie Took Off His Shoes  (Pippen Ain’t Easy)
• Butler May Have Missed A Shot But They Cement A Legacy  (Midwest Sports Fans)
• Politics And NASCAR  (Stock Car Spin)
• Top Ten Most Awesome Things From Opening Day  (Babes Love Baseball)
• Donovan McNabb:  High Impact  (Peter King)

•  Garret Jones Is A Monster  (PSaMP)
• The NHL’s Most Memorable Comebacks  (Down Goes Brown)
• Heir To The Leskanic Legacy  (Surviving Grady)
• LeBron, New York, ESPN and True Greatness  (Cleveland Frowns)
• The Tiger Woods Crank-Call Generator  (Slate)

Let’s begin again, begin the begin.  Let’s begin again like Martin Luther zen.  The mythology begins the begin.  -REM

Public Service Announcement:  Ok, here we go!  Woooo doggie!  Red Sox/Yankees.  If this doesn’t get your panties in a bunch, better call Dr. Kavorkian ‘cause there’s no hope for you.  May as well get the rope for you.  Maybe try some dope for you.  The greatest rivalry of them all.  Better than all the rest.  Better than Redskins/Cowboys.  Better than Ohio State/Michigan.  Better than Maple Leafs/Canadiens.  Better than Giants/Dodgers.  Better than all of ‘em.  A few episodes back on Lost, unLocke asks Kate:  “Have you ever had an enemy?  Someone that you needed to hate?  Very powerful, isn’t it?”  It certainly is.           Read More »