There’s a double dutch bus comin’ down the street movin’ pretty fast so kinda shuffle your feet. Get on the bus and pay your fare and tell the driver that you’re goin’ to a Double Dutch Affair. -Frankie Smith
Public Service Announcement: Ok, here we go! Double, double toil and trouble. Fire burn, and caldron bubble. Beltin’ Todd Helton’s is a burnin’ and a bubblin’. Burnin’ down the house. Doublin’ down the house. Some things sure can sweep me off my feet. This sweeps me off of my feet. Last night, Todd Helton recorded the 500th double of his major-league career. Hooray Todd Helton! Last night, Todd Helton recorded the 500th double of his major-league career in only his 1749th game. Last night, Todd Helton became third fastest man to 500 doubles. Only two players in MLB history reached 500 doubles in fewer games than Helton. Only Ducky Medwick and only Nap Lajoie. How about that?
Now, I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking you could record 500 damn doubles pretty damn fast your own damn self if you played all those damn games in damn Coors Field. Au contraire mon fraire. While its true that Helton has hit more doubles at home than on the road, the margin isn’t as wide as you might think (268-232). During Helton’s 12 full seasons, he has led the majors in doubles not only in home games but also on the road. Put that in your damn pipe and smoke it.
Peace out homies. Six two and Even!