Girls with boyfriends are the kind I like. I’ll steal your honey like I stole your bike. -Beastie Boys
Public Service Announcement: Ok, here we go! If you liked Jacoby Ellsbury stealing home the other night, you’re gonna love this. You’re gonna love Dexter Fowler. Like my main man John Robie always says, “Why did I take up stealing? To live better, to own things I couldn’t afford, to acquire this good taste that you now enjoy and which I should be very reluctant to give up.” If Dexter Fowler keeps this up, he’s going to live better. He’s going to own things he couldn’t afford. He’s going to acquire this good taste that you now enjoy and should be very reluctant to give up.
Rookie rookie, who gets the cookie? Dexter, that’s who. Dexter’s the big winner. Dexter wins. No, not that Dexter. Not the serial killer with a heart…just pray it’s not yours. No, not that guy. I’m talking about this guy.
I’m talking about the guy who just tied a modern-day rookie record with five stolen bases in the Rockies‘ 12-7 win against the Padres last night. I’m talking about the guy who is the first rookie with five steals in one game since the Padres’ Damian Jackson back in 1999.
Know this sports fans, Rickey Henderson stole five-or-more bases in a game only once. Lou Brock never did that. Neither did Rock Raines. Dexter Fowler has. Fowler is everything Rockies’ fans hope he would be. He is the model of consistency. He plays a mean centerfield. Coming into this season, folks knew that Fowler had all the potential in the world. Potential don’t walk the dog. Dexter Fowler’s walking the dog all right. He just may walk said dog all the way to Rookie of the Year. Sweet sassy molassy!
Peace out homies. Six two and Even!