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Cubs Fans Rejoice!

By: josh q. public on: Friday, May 30, 2008 @7:02 pm

Cubs Old Style

Baseball season’s underway.  Well you better get ready for a brand new day.  Hey, Chicago, what do you say?  The Cubs are gonna win today.  -Steve Goodman

Public Service Announcement:  Ok here we go!  Lookie lookie what we have here.  Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together… mass hysteria!  

The Cubs won last night.  The Devil Rays lost last night.  You know what that means boys and girls?  Huh?  Do ya?  That means this is only the second season in the last sixty years in which the Cubs have the best record at least fifty games into a season.  That means this is only the second season since Billy Buckner.  Since Manny Trillo.  Since Jose Cardenal.  Since Rick Reuchel.  Since Bruce Sutter.  Since those guys there.  But don’t get too excited.  Don’t lose control.  Don’t think you like it.  Those guys there went only 34-57 the rest of the way to finish at .500.  Enjoy it while you can North Siders

Enjoy your fearsome line-up.  Your fearsome line-up leading all of baseball in runs scored and batting average.  Enjoy your good enough pitching.  Good enough for the second best ERA in the NL.  Enjoy your gaudy 23-8 record at Wrigley FieldDerek Lee has found his power.  Aramis Ramirez is putting up his usual big time numbers.  Alfonso Soriano may be the best lead-off batter in the game today.  Newcomers Kosuke Fukudome and Geovany Soto have been tearing it up.  Haven’t got a caring it up.  Loaded for bearing it up.  Carlos Zambrano has been pitching like we always thought he should pitch.  The Cubs were supposed to be good.  They are who we thought they were.  You wanna crown their asses then crown ‘em.

Public Acknowledgements:  Ghost Busters, Pointer Sisters and Dennis Green

Public Spectacle:

Peace out homies.  Six two and Even!

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