Public Knowledge

Every truth has two sides.  It is well to look at both sides before we commit ourselves to either side.  -Aesop        

Public Knowledge:

1.  A tale of four pitchers.  It was the best of times; it was the worst of times.  Jon Lester.  Clay Buchholz.  Phil Hughes.  Ian Kennedy.  Last seen, Jon Lester out-dueled Roy Halliday.  Deliverance style.  Squeal like a pig!  He worked eight shutout innings.  He allowed just one hit.  He got timely double plays.  He was terrific.  Top of the list.  King of the hill.  “A” number one.  

Last seen, Clay Buchholz, eight starts into his big-league career, held the Devil Rays to one hit through seven innings.  Eventually, Buchholz gave up a two-out, two-run bomb to Akinori Iwamura.  It was just the third hit allowed by the young phenom.  He should have earned the “W”.  Unfortunately, the Sox bats weren’t cooperating. 

Last seen, Phil Hughes allowed six runs on eight hits in 3 2/3 innings during his start three days ago against the Tigers.  Hughes is 0-4.  Hughes has a 9.00 earned run average.  Hughes has been sent to the disabled list. 

Last seen, Ian Kennedy gave up four runs in 4 2/3 innings in his start against the Tigers last night.  Kennedy may be on his way out of the rotation.  Kennedy may be on his way to the Triple-A.  So you tell me, who has the best young arms?  Ya ya.  You can Joba Chambermaid me all you want.  But you know what I’m talking about.  The answer is undoubtedly, the Red Sox.  Sharp like cheddar.  My rhymes are better.  It is a far, far better thing that I do, than I have ever done.  It is a far, far better rest that I go to than I have ever known.  Rest well Fenway Faithful.  Roll Sox roll.

2.  Down go the 76ers.  Get along 76ers.  Charles Barkley dissed Larry Bird.  Charles Barkley is not walking through that door, fans.  The Sixers were eliminated from the NBA playoffs last night in a 23-point drubbing to the Deetroit Pistons.  It was the second-largest drubbing in an elimination game in team history.  The Sixers suffered a 120-87 elimination drubbing to my Celtics back in 2002. 

I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t rooting for the Sixers in this one.  A lesser of two evils.  I hate the Deetroit Pistons far worse than I ever hated the 76ers.  I hated Zeke.  I hated Rodman.  I hated Mahorn.  I hated them all.  Hence, I still hate them.  If I said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times.  No hurt McHale in ‘87, no Bad Boys.  Period.

3.  Osgood?  Osgreat!  The Red Wings victory over the Avalanche was the sixth consecutive win for Chris Osgood.  The sixth consecutive win since he relieved the Dominator in Game Four of Detroit’s first-round win over Nashville.  Big deal, you say?  Who cares, you say?  I say, over the last thirty years, only one other goalie has won six straight playoff games in a postseason in which he wasn’t his team’s first-round starter in Game One.  I say it was Cam Ward.  Now that’s saying something. 

4.  Celtics/Hawks tonight.  Game Six.  Make no mistake about it, the Celtics will not allow the Hawks to survive.  The Celtics will not allow the Hawks to survive for a Game Seven.  No how.  No way.  Rajon Rondo will push it.  Push it real good.  Both offensively and defensively.  The Truth will pick up where he left off in Game Five.  Hitting big baskets.  Hauling in big rebounds.  Playing big defense.  And Kevin Garnett will be Kevin Garnett.  Nuff said.  The Hawks do not a stand a chance tonight.  Not a chance I say.  No matter what the Human Highlight Reel may think.  What did he ever win anyway?

5.  It just keeps getting worse for these guys.  Clemens denies steroids.  Clemens is found to be boinking a minor.  Clemens is found to be getting sloppy seconds after John Daly.  Now this. 

Tim Montgomery.  Track star.  Former 100-meter world record-holder.  Gold and Silver medallist in the Olympics.  Now he’d be lucky to make Scooby’s All Star Laff-A-Lympics.  Tim Montgomery has been indicted on heroin distribution charges.  Montgomery has said he knew nothing of the accusations and that his arrest was a “total surprise.”  Just like his banishment from track for doping was a surprise.  Surprise, surprise, surprise.  Too many Gomer Pyles around here.  Not enough Giambi’s and Pettittes.  Not that they are heroes.  Not by a long shot.  They got caught.  They admitted it.  They’re still playing baseball. 

6.  Are you guys watching Lost?  You should be.  Best show on television.  If you’re not, go down to Blockbuster and rent Disc One of Season One.  You’ll be back down there for Disc Two like a crackhead looking for his next hit.

7.  One bit of advice for the Atlanta Hawks.  Hire Avery Johnson.  As soon as you lose tonight.  Hire him.  You will not regret it.  Not as much as Johnson would regret taking the Knicks job.  And Charles is right.  What the heck is Kenny the Jet thinking?  GM of the Knickerbockers?  He must be out his godammed mind.

8.  Rest in Peace Buzzie.  Buzzie Bavasi dies at 93.  Bavasi built Dodgers teams that won four World Series titles in Brooklyn and Los Angeles.  Bavasi helped put together Dodgers teams that included future Hall of Famers Jackie Robinson, Duke Snider, Pee Wee Reese, Roy Campanella, Sandy Koufax and Don Drysdale.  He died last night.  He will be missed.

9.  Yankees still suck.

Peace out homies.  Six two and Even!

PS:  My good friends at the Salute Millitary Golf Association will be featured this weekend on CBS Sports.  The SMGA’s mission is to provide rehabilitative golf experiences for combat-wounded veterans in an effort to improve the quality of life for these American heroes. The SMGA believes that the rehabilitative benefits of golf can improve the mental and physical condition of each and every soldier returning from combat.  What’s a better cause than that, huh?  The special, titled PGA Tee Time 2008, airs Sunday, May 4, on CBS from 1:00 to 2:00 p.m. EST.

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