I’m down in Philly for opening day.  See all y’all tomorrow! 

Well I’m not dumb but I cant understand why she walked like a woman and talked like a man.  Oh my Lola.  Lo-Lo-Lo-Lo Lola.  -Kinks

Public Service Announcement:  Ok, here we go!  Enough is enough.  Barry Bonds.  Roger Clemens.  But this is just ridiculous.  I thought this ended with the East German swimmers.  Tammy Thomas.  Cyclist.  World Champeen cyclist.  Tom McVay, a tester for the U.S. Anti-Doping Agency, told a jury in U.S. District Court in San Francisco that on March 14, 2002, he was assigned to locate Thomas at and collect a urine sample for a steroid test.  Not a job I would want, but hey.  It’s a living.  Prosecutors have called Thomas a “hard-core” steroid user who underwent a physical transformation while using banned drugs.  McVay found this out first hand.  Found this out when he knocked on Thomas’ door.  “It appeared to be like shaving cream on the left side of her face around her ear.”  Yikes.  Let Noxema cream your face, so the razor won’t.  Dr. Margaret Weirman:  “Thomas had a deep voice, full beard, chest hair and even signs of male pattern baldness.”  Goodness!  That’s no woman, that’s a man, man. 

Public Spectacle:

Public Acknowledgements:  Lance Williams and Austin Powers

Peace out homies.  Six Two and Even!

Josh Q. Public:  The hardest working man in blog buisness!

Public Service Announcement:  Ok, here we go!  Just a quick one today.  A Big Ticket one today.  Here’s your ticket.  Hear the drummer get wicked.        Read More »

See you tomorrow!

Peace out homies.  Six Two and Even!

One more time.  We’re gonna celebrate.  Oh yeah, alright.  Don’t stop the dancin’.  One more time.  -Daft Punk 

Public Service Announcement:  OK, here we go!  First place baby!  First place.  First place thanks to Mr. Manny Ramirez.      Read More »

Let me root, root, root for the home team.  If they don’t win it’s a shame.  For it’s one, two, three strikes, you’re out, at the old ball game.  -Jack Norworth

Public Service Announcement:  OK, here we go!  Major League Baseball.  I live for this!  Smell it?  Ooooh that smell.  Can’t you smell that smell?   Smells like neat’s-foot oil in that old Wilson A2000.  Smells like Derek Jeter?  Smells like Red Man.  Smells like Fenway Franks.  Smells like spilled beer on the hot concrete.   Smells like freshly cut grass.  That was me.  I’d wake up at night with the smell of the ballpark in my nose, the cool of the grass on my feet…The thrill of the grass.  The thrill of the grass is back!  The thrill of the grass is back early in the morning.  Gap Band style.  The thrill of the grass is back tomorrow Gap Band style in the Land of the Rising Sun.  And I can’t wait. 

I can’t wait for baseball.  I believe in the Church of Baseball.  Like my main man Rogers Hornsby always says:  “People ask me what I do in winter when there’s no baseball.  I’ll tell you what I do.  I stare out the window and wait for spring.”  Well Rajah, spring has done sprung.  Baseball begins and the 2008 storylines are ready to be played out. 

• Are they paper Tigers? 
• Can Johan redeem the Mets? 
• Are the Sox still the team to beat? 
• Is anybody gonna sign Bonds? 
• Can the Rockies do it again?  The Diamondbacks? 
• Is Joe Girardi really going to do any better than Joe Torre? 
• How many guys will caught juicing? 
• Will the Reds finish above the Red Birds.  The Rays above the Yankees? 
• Will Phat Albert Winnie the Pujols’ elbow last? 
• Is Evan Longoria that good?  Is Cameron Maybin? 
• Mets, Phillies or Braves? 
• Will Curt Schilling pitch again?  How well will Randy Johnson pitch?  Bartolo Colon?   Pedro? Greg Maddux? 
• Can Maddux put a baseball through a Lifesaver enough for the eight more wins he needs to pass the Rocket for eighth all time?
• Can Junior get the fifteen dings he needs to pass Slammin’ Sammy for fifth? 
• Will Moneyball ever be winning it all ball? 
• Is this the Year of the Cub? 
• Will Hank become more insufferable than George ever was? 
• Is this Bobby Cox’ last season in Atlanta? 
• Can the Astros win with hitting alone? 
• How bad are the Twins? 

All these questions and so many more.  We can stop asking them now.  Baseball season is starting again now.  The one constant through all the years, Ray, has been baseball.  America has rolled by like an army of steamrollers.  It has been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt and erased again.  But baseball has marked the time.  Tomorrow, baseball will be marking time again.  It’s about time.

So get up at six.  Take your shoes off.  Put your feet up.  Sit back.  Relax.  And be a Sox watcher.  I live for this game!

Public Acknowledgements:  Lynyrd Skynyrd, Joe Jackson, Bull Durham and Field of Dreams.

Peace out homies.  Six two and Even!

While we enjoy the Madness, let’s take a moment to reflect on the greatest college basketball team of all time. Let’s take a moment to reflect on the best college basketball team I’ve ever seen. The best college basketball team there’s ever been. Better than Mean Joe Greene. Let’s take a moment to reflect on the 1990 UNLV Running Rebels:

Peace out homies. Six two and Even!

The cowboys cry.  Ki-yip-pie-yi.  Deep in the heart of Texas.  -George Strait

Public Service Announcement:  Ok, here we go!  Three big games in Texas.  Three big playoff contenders in Texas.  Three big wins in Texas.  Big Three wins in Texas.  The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. 

The Celtics massacred the World Champeen Spurs.  The Celtics massacred the red hot Rockets.  And last night, the Celtics massacred the Dallas Mavericks.  What a game, what a game!  Down to the Wire.  Omar Little style.  Omar:  “I’ll do what I can to help y’all.  But, the game’s out there, and it’s play or get played.  That simple.”  The Celtics did the playing last night.  Put on a displaying last night.  Won going awaying last night.  That simple. 

It was anyone’s game to win.  Ultimately, it was Sugar Ray Allen’s game to win.  Threecola!  No soup for you!  No soup for anyone.  After this Texas Three Step, the Boston Celtics are, without a doubt, the favorites to win the NBA Championship.  You can King James me.  You can Kobe Bean me.  Heck, you can even try to San Antonio Spurs me.  I ain’t biting.  The Celtics just beat the defending champs.  The Celtics just stopped the second longest winning streak in NBA history.  The Celtics just shut down the offensive juggernaut Mavs.  The Celtics just shut down the offensive sluggernaut Mavs.  The Celtics just shut down the offensive punch you in the muggernaut Mavs.  The Boston Celtics are the best team in the free world.  Like Neil Young, they keep on rockin’ in the free world. 

Rockin’ with defense.  Tracy McGrady called them the best defense he’s ever seen in his eleven years in the NBA.  The best defense there’s ever been in his eleven years in the NBA.  The best defense since James Dean in his eleven years in the NBA.  This is a team that last year went on stretches playing worse defense than Michael Redd.  Worse defense than Antawn Jamison.  Worse defense than Troy Hudson.  This year, the Celtics are ranked number one in the National Basketball Association in points allowed.  This year, the Celtics are ranked number one in the National Basketball Association in opponents field goal percentage.  This year, the Celtics are ranked number one in the National Basketball Association in opponents three-point field goal percentage.  This year, the Celtics are ranked number one in the National Basketball Association in point differential.  What does it take to be number one?  Two is not a winner and three nobody remembers. 

What does it take to be number one?  Tom Thibodeau.  That’s what.  Tom Thibedeau, Celtics assistant coach.  Tom Thibedeau, defensive guru.  Defensive maharishi.  Defensive swami.  In his seventeen seasons as an assistant, Thibodeau has helped his teams finish in the NBA’s top ten in team defense fourteen times.  Yowza!  He helped the Rockets rank in the top five in the NBA in scoring defense and field goal percentage defense in all four years he was with the team.  Holy cow!  In his first year with Houston, Thibodeau helped the Rockets set franchise records in scoring defense and field goal percentage defense.  Whoa Nelly!  During his tenure with the Knicks, New York set a then-NBA record by holding thirty-three consecutive opponents under 100 points in the 2000-01 season.  How about that! 

Now, the Celtics under Thibodeau, are suddenly playing defense.  Suddenly Susan.  Like that boy from INXS, they are playing suffocating defense.  Smothering defense.  Asphyxiating defense.  They are cutting off the penetration.  They are contesting every shot.  They are trapping in the corners.  They are crashing the boards.  Rebounding, helping, switching, basically everything that you expect your team to do on defense.  Crushing opponents on a nightly basis.  Crushing opponents in a town near you.  Is New Orleans a town near you?  They got next.  Lucky them.

Public Spectacle: 

Peace out homies.  Six two and Even!

A buddy of mine sent me this link.  I never thought I’d live to see the day somebody used me as a reference.  Wikipedia or not.  I am footnote number five.  “Drew has also been criticized by fans and the media for his perceived lack of effort, leading to nicknames such as ‘D.L. Drew’ or ‘Nancy Drew.’”  Thank you JD.  Thank you Wikipedia.  Thank you Al Gore.

Peace out homies.  Six Two and Even!

We are family.  I got all my sisters with me.  We are family.  Get up ev’rybody and sing.  -Sisters Sledge

Public Service Announcement:  Ok, here we go!  Here we go, Daddy-O!  Let’s get ready for the show.  I love the Madness.   Love it more than Adrian Barbeau.  This is it.  Tonight’s the night.  Stay away from my window.  Stay away from my back door too.  Disconnect the telephone line.  Relax baby, and draw that blind.  Ahhh March Madness.  The thrills.  The spills.  Oh, the humanity!  So many story lines.  So little time.  Tiiiiime is on my side.  Yes it is.  I know.  I’m stalling.  Stalling when you want basketballing.  Here you go. 

March Madness:  It’s A Family Affair.  Like Buffy.  Like Jody.  Like Uncle Bill.  Like Mr. French.  Like those folks there.  This year’s edition of the NCAA basketball tournament features as many famous family lines as I can remember.  Like my main Colonel Potter always says:  I don’t care how poor a man is; if he has family, he’s rich.  These guys have family.  These guys are rich.  These guys are in the NCAA tournament:

Patrick Ewing Jr.  Georgetown:  We’ll start with an easy one.  You know Patrick Ewing Sr.  NBA Hall of Fame Patrick Ewing Sr.  You know Patrick Ewing Sr. gave the Georgetown Hoyas a chance to win the whole thing against Big Games James and the UNC Tar Heels.  Gave the Georgetown Hoyas a chance to win the whole thing against Big Games James and the UNC Tar Heels up until Fred Brown threw that pass.  That horrible pass.  You know Patrick Ewing Sr. took the NCAA title with a victory over Phi Slamma Jamma only to be upset the following year in the upset of all upsets.  You know Patrick Ewing Sr.

Jeremiah Rivers  Georgetown:  Jeremiah was a bullfrog.  Jeremiah is the son of Boston Celtics’ coach Doc Rivers.  Marquette University’s Doc Rivers.  While playing assist man for the Human Highlight reel in Atlanta, Doc averaged a double-double for the 1986-87 season, scoring 12.4 points and helping out with 10.0 assists.  Doc went on to Coach the Orlando Magic.  Coach of the Year with the Orlando Magic.  Now he’s coaching the best team in all of basketball. 

AJ Price  Connecticut:  You may not know this one.  AJ’s father been dancing.  Tony Price been dancing.  Come dancing.  Come on sister, have yourself a ball.  Don’t be afraid to come dancing.  It’s only natural.  AJ’s father went dancing with Penn.  Ivy League Penn.  Ninth seeded Ivy League Penn back in 1979.  Down goes Iona.  Jim Valvano Iona.  Down goes number one seed UNC.  Down goes Syracuse.  Down Goes St John’s.  Final Four baby!  Final Four.  AJ’s father wins Eastern Regional MVP.  Do they still do that?  But you know what happens next.  1979.  Magic Johnson happens next.

Nolan Smith  Duke:  Nolan’s father is Derek. Derek helped Louisville win the 1980 National Collegiate Athletic Association championship.  Denny Crum’s Doctors of Dunk.  Darrell Griffith.  Rodney McCray.  Scooter McCray.  Derek Smith.  Smith played with Clippers.  Smith played with the Kings.  Smith played with the Celtics and Sixers.  He died of a heart attack back in August of ‘96.  This one’s for you Derek. 

Stephen Curry  Davidson:  Dell the Funky Homosapien.  That’s right.  Dell Curry.  The rootinest tootinest shootinest Hornet you ever did see.

Austin Daye  Gonzaga:  Darren Daye.  Darren was a McDonald’s All American who played his college ball at UCLA.  He toiled in the NBA for five years and four teams.  Ultimately went to Europe.  Ultimately played for Scavolini in Italy.  Ultimately won a European championship.

Jerai Grant Clemson:  Son of Harvey Grant.  Nephew of Horace. 

Klayton Korver Drake:  Brother of Kyle Korver.  The hairiest bobblehead of all time.

Ryan Wittman  Cornell:  Son of Randy Wittman

Marcus Landry  Wisconsin:  Brother of Carl Landry who sat out of the Rockets game as they got smashed by the best basketball team in the free world. 

Curtis Terry  UNLV:  Brother of Jason Terry.  The Jet.  Jason and his wife, Johnyika, have four daughters; Jasionna, Jalayah, Jaida and Jasa Azuré.  Yikes.  Jason has the number 206 tattooed on his chest.  It is his hometown area code. 

Wesley Matthews  Marquette:  Son of former Wisconsin guard Wes Matthews.

Ryan Ayers  Notre Dame:  Son of Randy Ayers.  Miami of Ohio.  Double-trouble.  Double-double on defending national champion Marquette.  Double-double in a shocking 1978 upset.  I shook the world!  Shook Marquette into such a funk that it took Flash Dwyane Wade to shake them out of it.  Randy is now an assistant coach with the Washington Wizards.

Daniel Hackett  USC:  Son of Rudy Hackett.  Rudy Hackett led Syracuse to an upset of a Tennessee team that featured Bernard King and Ernie Grunfeld.  I’ve heard of King Bernard.  I’ve heard of Ernie Grunfield. I’ve even heard of Buddy Hackett.  I’ve never heard of Rudy Hackett.

Peace out homies.  Six two and Even!