MVP: Kevin Garnett

I got so much trouble on my mind.  I refuse to lose.  Here’s your ticket.  Hear the drummer get wicked.  -Public Enemy

Public Service Announcement:  Ok, here we go!  Just a quick one today.  A run and stick one today.  A makes me sick one today.   

Kobe Bryant for MVP makes me sick.  LeBron James for MVP makes me sick.  The Most Valuable Player in the National Basketball Association this year is Kevin Garnett.  Period.  Stated.  Bordered.  The Big Ticket.  And I gotta get a meal ticket.  To survive you need a meal ticket.  To stay alive you need a meal ticket. 

The Celtics got their meal ticket alright.  We’re not talking McDonald’s dollar menu meal ticket.  We’re not talking Swanson’s Hungry Man meal ticket.  We’re talking Peter Luger’s.  We’re talking Sparks.  We’re talking Dylan Prime.  We’re talking United States Grade A  juicy porterhouse.  We’re talking Kevin Garnett.  

We’re talking the man who almost single-handedly turned around the NBA’s most storied franchise.  From pretender to contender.  He’s not doing it with all that fancy pants stuff.  He’s not doing it with all that prancey pants stuff.  He’s not doing it with all that dancey pants stuff.  We can dance if we want to.  We can leave your friends behind. 

He doesn’t take off from the foul line.  Dipsy-doo dunkeroo slam-jam-bam thank you ma’am.  He doesn’t fill it up for eighty.  He brings his lunch pail.  Night after night.  Fight after fight.  Brings his lunch pail night after night and wills the Celtics to victory.  Wills them to victory with his leadership.  His leadership on defense.  Defense wins championships.  Just ask the San Antonio Spurs.  Just ask the Big Fundamental.  Another cat who should be mentioned before King James and the Mamba. 

Kevin Garnett is a superstar.  Lives large.  A big house.  Five cars.  He’s in charge.  He is the best all around player in the league.  He scores.  He defends.  He rebounds.  He makes everybody around him better.  Everybody.  You know who does that on the Lakers?  Huh?  Do ya?  Pau.  That’s who.  So while everybody’s jerkin’ Kobe.  So while everybody’s jerkin’ LeBron.  Have the goddam common courtesy to give the Big Ticket a reach-around.  I’ll be watching you.

Public Acknowledgements:  Elton John, Men Without Hats, Dick Vitale and Gunnery Sgt. Hartman

Public Spectacle:

Peace out homies.  Six two and Even!

Need More? Boston Celtics, Kevin Garnett, NBA