Public Knowledge

Why a four-year-old child could understand this report!  Run out and find me a four-year-old child, I can’t make head or tail of it.  -Groucho Marx

Public Knowledge:

1.  Rest in Peace Myron Cope:

2.  So now the leaders of a House committee want the Justice Department to investigate if Rocket Roger Clemens lied under oath about using performance-enhancing drugs.  All I know is, this thing is going to cost a lot of time and a lot of money.  A lot of time and a lot of money to find out what we already know.  Roger Clemens used.  Why couldn’t he have just told the truth?  Honestly, would anyone have cared?  Jason Giambi?  He told the truth.  He got Comeback Player of the Year.  Andy Pettitte?  He told the truth.  He got himself a fresh new contract.  Roger Clemens?  He lied.  He’s going to jail.

3.  How are the Hornets still buzzing below the radar?  You saw them last night.  You saw them last night against Steve Nash and the mighty Phoenix Suns.  You saw them complete a four-game sweep against Steve Nash and the mighty Phoenix Suns.  Steve Nash and the mighty Phoenix Suns hadn’t been swept in a season-series of at least four games since 2003-04.  I guess the Hornets have arrived.  Chris Paul has arrived.  Chris Paul had 25 points and a dollar fitty last night.  Steve Nash had a meager eight points and a paltry buck thirty.  In four head-to-head meetings this season, Paul has had one more assist than Nash while outscoring him by an average of more than ten points per game.  MVP?  What say you?

4.  Larry Hughes had a game-high twenty-nine points last night.  Drew Gooden had fifteen rebounds last night.  Wally Szczerbiak went three for thirteen last night.  Ben Wallace had six rebounds last night.  I’m just saying.

5.  Uh oh.  Here come the Raptors.  An adventure 65 Million years in the making.  Well, thirteen years in the making, but you get my drift.  Like Dr. Ellie Sattler always says:  “I was overwhelmed by the power of this place; but I made a mistake, too.  I didn’t have enough respect for that power and it’s out now.”  Yes, it’s out now.  The Raptors have won three in a row and five of six.  In their five previous games, the Raptors’ average point differential was 11.6.  Good for third in the NBA behind the Los Angeles Lakers and Houston Rockets.  The Lakers and the Rockets who, with winning streaks of nine and 13 games, respectively, are the hottest teams in the NBA.  In the East, there’s been a lot of talk about the Celtics.  In the East, there’s been a lot of talk about the Pistons.  In the East, somebody better start talking about the Raptors. 

6.  Jeremy Roenick?  Really?  That Jeremy Roenick?  The Pride of Thayer Academy?  That Jeremy Roenick?  Over 100 points for three-straight seasons?  That Jeremy Roenick?  I thought he died.  I guess the reports of his demise were greatly exaggerated.  Jeremy Roenick had the game-winning goal for the Sharks’ last night. He only has ten goals this entire season.  But, but, seven of them have been game-winners.   Yowza!  In NHL history, only two other players had seven game-winners in their first ten or fewer goals of a season.  Wanna know who they are?  Huh?  Do ya?  Sure you do.   Both of them were defensemen.  Does that help?  The Maple Leafs’ Tim Horton hears a who in 1963-64 and that slap shooting fool, Al MacInnis in 1999-2000.

7.  I was gonna do a little a fantasy baseball thing.  I’m not.  Who knows?  I’m in so many leagues, I just may be in one with you.  I’m not helping you.  

8.    No grunting allowed.  A 9-year-old Australian girl has been banned from playing tennis at her local club over the noise she makes while competing.  Are you listening Maria Sharapova?  Are you listening Serena Williams?  Are you listening Monica Seles?  See what happens?  See what you guys started?  Hope you’re happy now.

9.  Ty Law has been released by the Kansas City Chiefs.  Ty Law was courtside at Boston’s Bank North Garden last night.  Are you thinking what I’m thinking?  I would like that.  I would like that a lot.

10.  I got my eye on this Milan Lucic character.  The Boston Bruins Milan Lucic.  Nineteen year-old Milan Lucic.  The next Terry O’Reilly. 

Peace out homies.  Six two and Even!

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