Night falls, I’m cast beneath her spell. Daylight comes, our heavens torn to hell. Am I left to burn and burn eternally? She’s a mystery to me. -Roy Orbison
Public Service Announcement: Ok, here we go! Who is this guy? Who is Ampex2000? Who is the new Deepthroat?
How much can you tell me about Deep Throat? How much do you need to know? Do you trust him? Yeah. I can’t do the reporting for my reporters, which means I have to trust them. And I hate trusting anybody. Run that baby!
Ampex2000 is running that baby. Running that baby into the ground. Running Chris Berman into the ground. In case you don’t know. In case you live in a cave. In case you’re an ostrich. In case of something like that there, Ampex2000 is a guy on You Tube who is putting out Chris Berman clips en masse.
In all, there are five videos from the set of Monday Night Football in 2000. Maybe two more yet to be released. Unflattering clips. Funny clips. Demeaning clips. Humiliating clips. I don’t know who this cat is, but I love him. Even his handle is sheer genius.
Ampex is an American electronics company founded in 1944 by Alexander M. Poniatoff. The Ampex 200 revolutionized the radio and recording industries in 1948. Brilliant! But, who is this guy? Who are you? Who? Who? I really want to know. I need to know. I gots to know.
Is it Harold Reynolds? Harold Reynolds fired for hugging it out bitch. Hugging it out while Chris Berman was you’re with me leathering it up it Scottsdale, Arizona. By the time I get to Arizona.
Is it Leather herself? Was she upset Berman would not leave his wife and two children for her? That is such a stupid question. What are you, stupid? That is so stupid. Is this stupid?
Is it Al Michaels? I don’t know.
Both Deadspin and Busted Coverage interviewed Ampex. He doesn’t reveal his true identity. His true Clark Kent. His true Bruce Banner. His true Peter Parker. Inquiring minds want to know. All we do know is this: “I used to be in broadcasting and in all my years there have been a few who were similar. However, I think Chris is probably in the top three as being the biggest pain to work with.”
Used to be in broadcasting, huh? Disgruntled employee?
- Trev Alberts? Fired after he failed to show up for work at ESPN’s studios in Bristol, Connecticut.
- Rush Limbaugh? Forced to step from Sunday NFL Countdown for his statements about Donovan McNabb.
- Greg Easterbrook, who was fired from ESPN for his distasteful comments about Jewish movie executives.
- Jason Whitlock?
Only time will tell. Oh, tiiiiiiime is on my side, yes it is. Tiiiiiiiiime is on my side, yes it is. Time is on Ampex2000’s side. He’s enjoying his fifteen minutes of fame. I am Batman! I just can’t wait to find out who the Bruce Wayne is.
Public Acknowledgements: All the President’s Men, Guinness, The Who, Public Enemy and DC Comics
Public Spectacle:
Peace out homies. Six two and Even!
Need More? Chris Berman, Sports Media
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