You Dirty Rat

I can’t stand it, I know you planned it.  I’m a’ set straight, this Watergate.  I can’t stand rocking when I’m in here ’cause your crystal ball ain’t so crystal clear.  So while you sit back and wonder why I got this fucking thorn in my side.  Oh my god, it’s a mirage.  I’m tellin’ y’all it’s sabotage.  -Beastie Boys

Public Service Announcement:  OK, here we go!  Eric Mangini.  I know it was you Fredo. You broke my heart.  You broke my heart!  You broke all of our hearts.  Broke all of our hearts with your treachery.  Like Brutus.  Like Benedict Arnold.  Like John Walker Lindh.  Like them.  And now you must pay.  Pay dearly. 

Remember Mean Joe Green.  Remember when Mean Joe kept kicking the Cleveland Browns’ Bob McKay repeatedly in the nuts when he was laying on the ground?  That’s nothing.  Rememeber when Big Ben Davidson of Da Oakland Raidaz speared Lenny the Cool Dawson while he was rolling around in the endzone?  That’s nothing.  Remember when the Packers’Charles Martin came up from behind and body slammed Jim McMahon to the turf, separating his shoulder and ending the quarterback’s season.  That’s nothing. 

Payback may not come by such violent means, but payback will come.  It will come in the form of Brady to Moss.  Again and again.  It will come in the form of Brady to Welker.  It will come in the form of Brady to Gaffney.  It will come in the form of Brady to everybody.  Revenge will come.  Revenge is mine sayeth the Brain.  Pinky, are you pondering what I’m pondering?  I think so, Brain, but how will we get the Spice Girls into the paella? 

Know this:  An NFL team averages eleven offensive drives pergame.  So a perfect game would be constituted of seventy-seven points.  The most points scored by one team in an NFL game is 72 when the Washington Redskins beat the New York Giants, 72-41, on Nov. 27, 1966.  Don’t count on this game being so close. 

Because of his ex-ballboy Mangini, Belichick had to write a check for $500,000 to the NFL.  Because of his ex-ballboy Mangini, Belichick lost a first-round draft pick.   Because of his ex-ballboy Mangini, all of Belichick past accomplishments have been put into question.  Super Bowls and all.  Brain does not forget.  He does not forget that it was Jets who drew first blood.  They drew first blood, not me.  They drew first blood.  They tried stealing players.  They tried stealing coaches.  And then this.  Then the snitching.  Now Mangini will get everything he deserves.  He will get the beating of his life.  And there will be much rejoicing in Patriot Nation.  Justice served.

Public Acknowledgements:  Godfather II, Pinky & the Brain and Rambo

Public Spectacle:

Peace out homies.  Six two and even!

Need More? Bill Belichick, Eric Mangini, NFL, New England Patriots, New York Jets