This is the end. Beautiful friend. This is the end. My only friend, the end. -The Doors
Public Service Announcement: Ok, here we go! What’s crack-a-lacking sports fans? Ha ha ha! Did you see it? Huh? Didjya? This is what the Deetroit Tigers did to the Yankees last night:
Red Sox Yankees. Tonight. Tonight’s the night. Stay away from my window. Stay away from my back door too. Disconnect the telephone line. Relax baby and draw that blind. Yup, this is it. Sing it with me bitches. Follow the bouncing ball. Na,na… na, na, na, na… hey, hey, hey… goodbye. Ha ha ha ha! Goodbye Yankees.
I know it. You know it. The ghost of George Herman Ruth knows it. The New York Yankees are all done. I guess it’s over, call it a day. Sorry that it had to end this way. No reason to pretend. We knew it had to end some day, this way. Yes we did. Yes we did. We knew the Yankees pitching staff was middling at best. We knew Phenom Phyllis Hughs was merely a rookie. A 2-2, 5.35 ERA rookie.
We knew Fat Roger was the savior of nothing. Not steadfast. Not true. Coming to no one’s emotional rescue. We knew Bullwinkle was meat. A mere shell of the man he once was. On this last road trip, the Yankees lost five of seven games to the Angels and Tigers. Lost them by scores of 7-6, 18-9, 9-6, 5-4 and 16-0. Just getting smacked around real good like. Not even giving the big bats a chance.
Until the Bombers can win a 2-1 nail biter. A 2-1 and still prevail biter. A 2-1 priority mail biter. Until they can win one of those, fuhgettaboutit. And just so you know. Just so you know, the last time the Yankees won a game when they scored fewer than five runs was July 17. On July 17, they beat the Blue Jays 3-2. They’re in big trouble. Ya got trouble. Right here in New York City! With a capital “T.” And that rhymes with “P.” And that stands for pitching.
The Red Sox got pitching. Heaps of pitching. Scads of pitching. Gobs of pitching. Pitching coming out of their eyeballs. Like the man says, you’re only as good as your next starter. Our next starter is D-Nice. Gyromite! So tonight’s the night we’re gonna make it happen. Tonight we’ll put all other things aside. Tonight we’ll step on the Yankees necks. Put them out of their misery. No division. No Wild Card. No nothing. Take your shoes off. Put your feet up. Sit back, relax, and be a Sox watcher. Roll Sox, roll!
Public Acknowledgements: NY Daily News, Casino, Rod Stewart, Steam, Johnny Mathis, Rolling Stones, Music Man, the Pointer Sisters and Raging Bull
Public Spectacle:
This is what the Sox will do to the Yankees:
Peace out homies. Six Two and Even!
Need More? Boston Red Sox, MLB
.jpg){kind=small}
