Knock ‘em out the box Rick. Knock ‘em out Rick. -Slick Rick
Public Service Announcement: OK, here we go! Rick Ankiel. Rick the Ruler has returned. The feel good story of the summer. I feel good, I knew that I would now. I feel good, I knew that I would now. So good. So good. I got you. The Cardinals got Rick Ankiel.
Feels as good as Josh Hamilton. Feels as good as Jon Lester. Feels as good Roy Hobbs. He lived for a dream that wouldn’t die. From an age of innocence comes a hero for today. Rick Ankiel is a hero for today. Pitcher turned outfielder. Like Buck Freeman. Like Lefty O’Doul. Like Babe Ruth. Like Bob Lemon and Ron Mahay, only backwards. Like Danny Ainge, but different. Like those guys, Ankiel is starting over. It’s like we both are falling in love again. It’ll be just like starting over, starting over.
Rick Ankiel is starting over. Rick Ankiel was a can’t miss prospect. Fireballing lefty. Inspireballing lefty. Making mugs perspireballing lefty. High School Player of the Year. Minor League Pitcher of the Year. Tearing it up. Major league debut in 2000 at age twenty. Won eleven games and struck out 194 batters in 175 innings. How about that? Good enough to earn himself the start in the first game of the NL Division Series against the Atlanta Braves. That’s when the unraveling began. That’s when his pitching career went into the garbage can. That’s when he needed to begin on a new master plan. Ankiel threw a record nine wild pitches in four postseason innings. Goodness! Badness. Mitch Williams had nothing on this cat. Wild thing. You make my heart sing. Things never got better. He pitched a paltry thirty-four innings in the majors after that. He walked twenty-six. He hit five. He threw six wild pitches. He missed all of 2002 and most of the next two seasons with arm problems. He tried one final comeback in the spring of 2005. To no avail. He couldn’t control the yips. Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker. And that’s how we got from there to here. From stud pitcher to stud outfielder.
There were trials and tribulations along the way. A trip back down to the minors. Out of the Big Show. Back to shower shoes with fungus on them. Back to handling your own luggage. No more white balls in batting practice. No more cathedral ballparks. No more room service. No more women with long legs and brains. But that didn’t matter to Ankiel. Didn’t matter to Tony LaRussa either. LaRussa: “This game is full of tests. And adversity. When one guy has had overwhelming amounts and has never complained, never pointed fingers and always taken responsibility . . . he’s earned a ton of respect and admiration.” And that’s why we love this story. That’s why we’re glad this is the story taking over the back pages. Why Cardinals’ fans rose to their feet in an extended standing ovation for Rick’s first at bat. Why a nation rallied behind Ankiel after his fourth at bat when he hit a three-run bomb off Doug Brocail deep to right to help the Red Birds defeat the San Diego Padres. Why we’re cheering even louder now that he hit two more bombs in one game on Saturday night. Cause Saturday night’s the night I like. Saturday night’s alright alright alright! Rick Ankiel’s all right. Just 755 to go.
Public Acknowledgements: Slick Rick, The Godfather of Soul, The Natural, John Lennon, The Troggs, Die Hard, Bull Durham and Elton John
Peace out homies. Six Two and Even!
Need More? MLB, Rick Ankiel, St. Louis Cardinals
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