Thinking is what a great many people think they are doing when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.  ~William James

Public Knowledge:

1.  Kobe Bean. The Mamba.  First he ran Shaq out of town.  Three rings and run out of town.  Rocked this town, rocked it inside out.  They rocked this town, made ‘em scream and shout.  The Lakers have not won a playoff series since O’Neal was traded.  The Lakers have a 121-125 record the last three seasons.  Now that Kobe has ruined his team, he wants out himself.  Is there anything to get you to remain with the Laker organization?  No, Bro.  Is there a more selfish player in all of sportsdom than this cat?  No, Bro.  And they say Lenny Bias hurt the Celtics.        Read More »

Just like my main man Johnny Drama, my boy Chompers gets Punk’d:

Peace out homies. Six two and Even!

It’s the eye of the tiger.  It’s the thrill of the fight.  Rising up to the challenge of our rival.  -Survivor

OK, here we go!  Uh oh!  Mango!  I bust the tango.  Got more hits than Jamaica’s got mangos.  Mags got more hits than Jamaica’s got mangos.  A slew of hits.  A gaggle of hits.  A plethora of hits.  Well, you just told me that I had a plethora, and I would just like to know if you know what it means to have a plethora.  I would not like to think that someone would tell someone else he has a plethora, and then find out that that person has no idea what it means to have a plethora.  Magglio knows what a plethora is.  I do too.       Read More »

Did you ever stop to think, and forget to start again?  ~Winnie the Pooh          

1.  One unhappy camper.  One very unhappy camper.  Hello muddah, hello faddah.  Here I am at Camp Granada.  Camp is very entertaining, and they say we’ll have some fun if it stops raining!  Will it ever stop raining at Camp Greenada?  First the Truth and Tony Allen go down.  Down goes our playoff hopes!  Then the tanking.  The lottery banking.  Turned out to be as worthless as the Central African Republic Francing.  Yi Jianlian?  Really?  A poor man’s Pau Gasol.  A destitute man’s Pau Gasol.  A hobo’s Pau Gasol.  Can’t we just trade the pick for the real Pau Gasol?  I’m beside myself right now.  Wahhhhh!  I wanted the Gigantic-O.  I hate him now.  Wahhhh!  I was all right, for a while.  I could smile for a while.  But I saw you last night.  You held my hand so tight as you stopped to say hello.  Oh, you wished me well.  You couldn’t tell that I’ve been crying over you.         Read More »

This is the end.  My only friend, the end.  Of our elaborate plans, the end.  Of everything that stands, the end.  No safety or surprise, the end.  I’ll never look into your eyes…again.  -The Doors

Public Service Announcement:  OK, here we go!  Ha ha ha!  This is too easy.  Easy like Weezy.  Like Chester Cheezey.  This is it.  Make no mistake where you are.  This is it.  Your back’s to the corner.  This is it.  Don’t be a fool anymore.  This is it.  This is it Yankees fans.  Turn back Gulliver. You’ll never make it.  You’re doomed.  Yes you are doomed.  Sinestro.  Bizaro.  Captain Cold.  Solomon  Grundy.  The whole lot of them.  Doomed.  Doomed, I say!        Read More »

We’re doing fine on the One and Nine line.  On the L we’re doin’ swell.  On the number Ten bus we fight and fuss.  ‘Cause we’re thorough in the boroughs and that’s a must.  -Beastie Boys

Public Service Announcement:  OK, here we go.  Huge rivalry, right?  Interleague play, right?.  Mets/Yankees.  Super Subway Series. Super Duper Subway Series.  Mark Duper. Dressed up like a million-dollar trooper. Tryin’ hard to look like Gary Cooper. Super duper. Optimus Prime vs. Megatron, right?  Transformers, more than meets the eyes.  Transformers, robots in disguise.  I am siding with Chuck D. and Flav on this one: We don’t need it do we?  It’s fake that’s what it be to ‘ya, dig me?  Don’t believe the hype!  I don’t believe the hype.  I walk around the City every day.  City sidewalks, busy sidewalks. There’s no buzz. There’s no electricity. There’s no chitchat by the water cooler.  No big splash in swimming pooler.  This one doesn’t make the big dog drooler.  No one cares.         Read More »

On the Dixie Cannonball.  On the Dixie Cannonball.  Just listen to the whistle, it’ll thrill you one and all.  Just shut my mouth, I’m headin’ south, on the Dixie Cannonball.  -Hank Williams

Public Service Announcement:  OK, here we go!  Like my main man Steve Erkel always says:  “Anybody got any cheese?”  Jake Peavy gots himself some cheese.  Cheese if you please.  Cheese more mind boggling than Parkinson’s disease.  Jake has some cheese all right.  High cheese.  Hard cheese.  100 miles per hour cheese.  Sharp like cheddar.  He pitches better.  Had some sharp cheddar the other night.  In his last start, Jake allowed a paltry three hits.  A paltry three hits over seven scoreless innings.  In seven scoreless innings, he was throwing that speedball by you.  Making you look like a fool boy.  Made the Cardinals look like fools boy.  Goose got me loose.  Gone on Patrone.  Money in my pocket.  And I’m all up in the zone like oooooooh Ima act a fool.  Peavy was up in the zone.  The Cardinals were acting a fool.      Read More »

Struck me kinda funny, seemed kind of funny sir, to me.  How at the end of every hard earned day, people find some reason to believe.  -Bruce Springsteen

Public Service Announcement:  OK, here we go!  What’s crack-a-lacking sports fans?  Just a quickie today.  I got stuff to do today.  Big stuff.  Important stuff.  Stuff you wouldn’t understand.  But I had to do this one today.  Do it on the run today.  Too much fun today.  Jim Leyland can eat my shorts today. Daisuke Matsuzaka.  D-Nice.  Dice-K.  Now do you believe it?  Like Christmas Eve it?  From here to Tel Aviv it?       Read More »

So come on get your rocks off, I’m gonna knock your socks off, you’ll see. Oh yeah! -Steve Miller Band

Public Service Announcement:  OK, here we go!  New Sox.  Two Sox.  Whose Sox? Sue’s Sox.  Who sews whose Sox?  Sue sews Sue’s Sox.  Who sees who sews whose new Sox, sir?  You see Sue sew Sue’s new Sox, sir. You see the Sox leading the AL Beast, sir. Having themselves a big fat feast, sir.  The never say die Sox.  The punch you in the eye Sox.  The bye-bye Miss American Pie Sox. Waving bye-bye to the Yankees.  Waving bye-bye to the Blue Jays.  Waving bye-bye to the Orioles.          Read More »

Don’t you know I’m still standing better than I ever did.  Looking like a true survivor, feeling like a little kid.  -Elton John

OK, here we go!  Like my main man Mark Twain always says: ”The rumors of my death have been greatly exaggerated.”  The rumors of Ken Griffey Jr’s death have been greatly exaggerated.  Don’t call it a comeback!  I been here for years. Rockin’ my peers and puttin’ suckas in fear.  Ken Griffey Jr’s been here for years.  Ken Griffey Jr’s been rockin’ his peers.  Puttin’ suckers in fear.  What’s the frequency Kenneth?          Read More »